The Kaos Theory

Theorem on Salary....

2005-05-06T22:29:00.000-07:00

I was just playing one of my favorite activities when I'm bored it's called "next blog". It's an easy game to play and I'm positive I'm not the only one playing it. All you have to do is click on the "next blog" button provided you use blogger. I'm not sure if I should be worried about what I find or worried about the people who have time to find it out.

Theorem on Salary....
Dilbert's Theorem on Salary states that engineers and
scientists never earn
as much salary as business executives ,salespeople &
Management guys This
theorem can now be supported by a mathematical
equation based on the
following three postulates:

Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power (Knowledge=Power)

Postulate 2: Time is Money (Time=Money)

Postulate 3:
(as every engineer knows):
Power =Work/Time

It therefore follows:

Knowledge = Work / Time
and since Time = Money,

we have:

Knowledge =Work / Money.

Solving for Money, we get:

Money = Work/Knowledge

Thus, as Knowledge approaches Zero,

Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of
Work done.

Conclusion 1:

The Less you Know, the More you Make.

Conclusion 2:

This is the reason why your BOSS is paid more.

Herbal Pert

2005-05-05T15:54:00.000-07:00

I always thought Herbal Pert was a shampoo but evidently he's some guy that plays a Trumpet. Herb Alpert. Jimminy Crickets I'm dense.

Herb Alpert

Herbal Pert

Testaclese - The Big Happy Penis

2005-05-05T11:58:00.000-07:00

Testaclese - The Big Happy Penis
Anytime I see people standing up to all this PC nonsense, I get that happy feeling deep in my soul. God I hate PC. Blacks call each other the N word all the time but if I call somebody the N word. I'm toast. My life would be ruined. Speech at one time used to be free but I'm afraid it's only free to those who follow the strict PC ideology. When Trent Lott was raked over the coals for praising Strom Thurmond the entire media establishment had a collective orgasm but dare point out the "Conscience of the Senate" democrat Robert Bird was the Grand Kleagle of the KKK, all you will hear are crickets chirping.

Freedom Day!

2005-05-03T12:46:00.000-07:00

This last month has been one of the longest, grueling and utterly a waste of time. But what the heck I got paid for doing as little as possible and didn't get called on the carpet for it. After getting notified 90% of our programming staff was having their positions reduced. Neat term huh? Reduced. Sounds like something out of the movie Logan's Run. The words' true meaning is this context is we've sent all these nice high wage jobs to India where we can hire 4 people for the same price without having to pay benny's.

mmmm...beer

Homerisms, actually a Margism

2005-04-20T19:47:00.000-07:00

Just was watching a Simpson's episode where Homer decides to become an inventor. One of his inventions was a shot gun make-up dispenser. He ends up firing a point blank shot at Marge's face creating, well its hard to describe until Marge pipes up and says. "Homer, you got it set on Whore." I couldn't help myself. I just about pissed my pants for some reason. I guess you have to see the show and be bent like me.

Dr. Sanity: Narcissism and Society - Part II

2005-04-17T15:53:00.000-07:00

Dr. Sanity: Narcissism and Society - Part II: "Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated, but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.'"
This is quite interesting. I've never deleved into the pyschology of party affiliation but this was quite a read.
Of all tyrannies a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It may be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated, but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end, for they do so with the approval of their own conscience."

Mark Twain Quotes

2005-04-16T10:42:00.000-07:00

I was just surfing around waiting for breakfast to finish cooking when I found a page compiling quotes from Mark Twain. Some of my favorites.

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

An Englishman is a person who does things because they have been done before. An American is a person who does things because they haven't been done before.

Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying that I approved of it.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Historic Darwin Award winners

2005-04-16T10:32:00.000-07:00

Darwin Awards: 1994 Darwin Awards
You just never know.

The Eight Dwarves

2005-04-15T16:43:00.000-07:00

We've all seen this during our lifetime. You're driving down the road and you'll see the crews working on some public works project be it the gas company, cable company, dept of transportation workers etc. Have you ever noticed there are always 6 or seven of these guys standing around with shovels looking at the one guy in the hole. He's the only one doing any work. Well I have picture proof. First you've got 2 of them futzing by the lip, one flanking them on either side as well as one driving the tractor. At the right and left edges you can barely makeout 2 more dwarfs. That EIGHT workers to unearth 8 inches of soil in a 4 X 4 area. You wonder why our utility and cable bills are outrageous.

How to get fired in fifty easy lessons

2005-04-14T15:43:00.000-07:00

the Phat Phree - Features
This is ironic since I just got RIF'd(reduced in force). I should have thought of these myself. After May 2 I'll have plenty of time to think about such things.
Some of my favorites:

43. The Switcheroo
Repeatedly change your boss' homepage to farmgirls.com, and then put a repair request into the IT department from his email.

35. The Health Plan Brunch
When the company is having a doughnut brunch to explain their new health insurance plan, ask, “So, which STDs are covered by this policy? Does a new outbreak of herpes count as a pre-existing condition? What if it's a form of hepatitis that is not currently found in the USA, but you can only get it from Russian prisons and Malaysian teen prostitutes? You know, that kind that causes the pus blisters on your hands? What would be my deductible?” Then touch everybody’s doughnuts.

29. The Skeptic
Anytime you are in a meeting, raise your hand and and ask your boss, "What makes you so smart?" or "How’d you figure that Einstein?" or "You come up with that all by yourself, champ?"

26. The Diaper
Brag about how much more work you've gotten done since you started wearing Depends. Lie down on top of your desk and change yourself periodically throughout the day. Talk to yourself in the baby voice while you do it, "You are a good boy. A BIG boy too. Look at you." Leave the soiled diapers in your regular trash.

11. The Come On Down
Bring a little television into your cubicle and watch the Price is Right everyday, cheering loudly. Be sure to call bullshit when you guess wrong, and insist you could get that item cheaper at any grocery store in America.

Lame Duck or Not?

2005-04-13T09:08:00.000-07:00

Why are people so concerned about the Presidents job approval rating? He can't run for a third term so why all the handwringing? He has a majority in both houses so I think the term "lame duck" doesn't apply to this President. When was the last time the Democrat party had control of both the Senate and house? I think if the party in power has control of the house and the presidency, this tends to make the occupant of the oval office more likely to be labeled "lame duck" due to the balance check from the Senate.

Soccer Epihany

2005-04-10T18:14:00.000-07:00

While waching the English Premier League soccer highlights today I noticed a unusual phenomenon. If you score a goal, it is the prerequisite of your teammates to hinder you from celebrating said goal and pummelling you into submission.

My first DU koolaid drinker

2005-03-17T22:02:00.000-08:00

Section 15
Looks like I have my first visitor form the DU koolaid drinking crowd. Mark from commented from a post I did regarding Jon Stewert/Nancy Soderberg exchange on "The Daily Show". He asked me "Did I actually watch the video? or just read the misleading transcript?" Well I always thought the transcript was WHAT THEY SAID? How do I fight against such brilliant logic? I know I should just write it off as nonsense fromm the DU crowd but I decided to take a look at this enlightened ones blog. Boy did I find some choice stuff. In a post titled " Do the Body Count!" I found where he's coming from. His first sentence is a logical conumdrun.

Despite my certified anti-Iraq War credentials, I was in favour of removing Sadam Hussein from power through the use of force.

So how was he to remove Saddam without force? More UN sanctions? Magical fairy dust? He's for using force without using force, sounds just like Kerry.

I liken the situation from the end of the first Gulf War through to 2002 as a hostage situation. We were sitting behind our barricades, negotiating, making at times dubious trades with the gunmen in order to keep the hostages fed, and generally sitting on our collective behinds waiting for some sort of resolution to present itself.

Now who was the sitting President when we were doing this "sitting on our collective behinds" through the 90's?

It had become clear that we were going to grow very old waiting. In the meantime, what of the hostages? What of their lives, their liberty, their human rights? There comes a moment in any standoff when it's time to act and resolve the matter.

Who was the one the decided we were going to "act and resolve the matter"?

So yes, I could have supported invading Iraq, maiming and killing people, threatening to further destabilize a troubled region, mostly in the name of liberty, a little in the cause of world safety.

What about the "maiming and killing of people" already going on in Iraq for the prevoius 30 years? Mass graves, rape rooms, gassing of the Kurds and choking off the marsh Arabs by Saddam and his henchmen? What's more destablizing to a region than attacking 2 of your neighbors? One of which happend to be my fathers homeland.

By late 2002, I had dropped my support for the war for two reasons:

* It was clear the WMD threat was being massively exaggerated
* There was no sign of a serious reconstruction and democratization plan

First bullit point here
The NYT isn't exactly pro Bush but I suppose the article is some sort of right wing conspiracy. Second bullit point, take a look at anything at Cherkoff and you will find a plethora of information not reported by the MSM to debunk this false premise. I'm too tired to get into the rest his post at this moment. It's St. Paddy's day damn it and I've got to do my share to reduce the supply of Guiness!
track backed at OTB

Pay as You Go, So to Speak.

2005-03-12T16:46:00.000-08:00

Yahoo! News - Florida Lawmaker Seeks Toilet Paper Tax
When I read this the first time I thought it was satire but I was completely wrong. Some of the quotes the reporter sites in the story have that humorous double-entendre quality to them. Such as:

In a Republican-dominated Legislature that doesn't like new taxes, the idea is likely to pretty quickly end up in the tank.

Senate President Tom Lee, R-Brandon, said he didn't think it would get too far, but didn't rule it out."We'll be getting to the bottom of it real soon," Lee said.

"We're not wild about tax increases," said House Speaker Allan Bense, R-Panama City. "But we'll certainly let it go through the system."
If it were to pass, the extra two pennies would start being charged in October. Lawson said it could generate $50 million a year.

Those Pesky Silicon Packets

2005-03-11T16:55:00.000-08:00

What's the purpose of those little silicom packets? They seem to be in everything nowadays, even a childrens shoe box. Why? There's probably a landfill full of those little things.

Free Heroin For Canadians!

2005-03-11T12:16:00.000-08:00

FOXNews.com - U.S. & World - Vancouver Tries Free Heroin Program

Everyday it seems Canada is following the wonderful lead of those sophisticated Euroweenies. Here are some choice quotes.

Vancouver Police Chief Jamie Graham (search) is among supporters who say the heroin giveaway will let junkies shoot up without having to resort to theft or prostitution to buy their drugs. Breaking that cycle of crime, they argue, is the first step toward turning an addict's life around.

“I’m not a medical expert, this is not my field. I'm an expert in public safety," Graham said. "And if this will help reduce the crime rate — I'm all for it.

"
Here's an thought. If they are caught commiting a crime why don't you put them in jail? A long enough jail term will let these losers dryout and if the recommitt they get a real long term. This guy has the gall to call himself a "expert in public safety". So now you have a bunch of felons running around Vancouver smacked out of their gourds. I feel safer already. Even the junkies are skepitable.

Junkies offered different views of the program to FOX News. Some think it's the government's way of killing them, while others say they can't wait for the free dope. But none of them thought it would eventually get them clean.

"I think it would lower the crime rate. Nobody's gonna be robbing each other. Nobody's going to be sick enough to rob each other. All be taken care of. Free dope, woo-hoo,” said heroin addict Olivia Edgars. Recovered addict Chuck Swesey - who's been clean 20 years - says the program smacks of government drug pushing. He says he knows how he would've ended under a program like this: "I'd be dead ... or I'd be in a jail or an institution."

The $8 million Canadian program is patterned after similar efforts in Europe.

Even the junkies are honest enough to admit this program won't work.

One for the Beltway traffic jam. Click the OTB link below and enjoy.
h/t OTB

Weekly Darwin Award Winner

2005-03-11T09:05:00.000-08:00

Darwin Awards: 2003 Darwin Awards

Here's the Weekly Darwin Award winner, This one placed second in 2003.

Monkey Attacks

2005-03-07T12:06:00.000-08:00

I was listening to the my local AM radio station this morning when at the bottom of the hour newscast they were airing an interview with the wife of the guy who got attacked by monkeys in California. I could believe what I was hearing. I have to find the video or transcript somewhere because she said at the end of the clip, I'm paraphrasing here, "he was just trying to "reason" with them". The guy has one monkey chomping on his foot and the other monkey munching on his head and he wants to "reason" with them. Jimminy Crickets what was this guy thinking? Once he get's well, he definitely has another career choice, French Diplomat.
"

One was at his head, one was at his foot. But all that time ... he was trying to reason with them," a sobbing LaDonna Davis told "Good Morning America." "I couldn't do anything.

"

In order to find this I did a google of "monkey attacks". OMG think the Planet of the Apes thing is in full swing. Here are just a few from the first page.
Monkey 1
Monkey 2
Monkey 3
In the last one in the opening paragraph.

TOKYO (AP) -- A rogue monkey believed to be searching for a mate has attacked 23 women in a northern Japan town, police said Tuesday.

About a dozen police and 30 town officials were searching for the monkey, said Shigeru Arai, deputy chief of police in Suwa town, about 100 miles northwest of Tokyo.

The attacks began Monday, when the monkey bit 14 women as they put out garbage or left home for work, Arai said. Nine more women were attacked Tuesday, he said. Most of the victims were ages 50 to 80.

Here's something different

2005-03-07T10:40:00.000-08:00

bold the states you've been to, underline the states you've lived in and italicize the state you're in now...

Alabama / Alaska / Arizona / Arkansas / California / Colorado / Connecticut / Delaware / Florida / Georgia / Hawaii / Idaho / Illinois / Indiana / Iowa / Kansas / Kentucky / Louisiana / Maine / Maryland / Massachusetts / Michigan / Minnesota / Mississippi / Missouri / Montana / Nebraska / Nevada / New Hampshire / New Jersey / New Mexico / New York / North Carolina / North Dakota / Ohio / Oklahoma / Oregon / Pennsylvania / Rhode Island / South Carolina / South Dakota / Tennessee / Texas / Utah / Vermont / Virginia / Washington / West Virginia / Wisconsin / Wyoming / Washington D.C /

Go HERE to have a form generate the HTML for you.

In the Garden II

2005-03-06T20:42:00.000-08:00

In the Garden

2005-03-06T20:39:00.000-08:00

Captain's Quarters

2005-03-04T20:54:00.000-08:00

This is in reference relating to the issue of the McCain-Feingold campaign Finance Reform. I have cut and paste a blog entry from a highly respected blogger. I would hope that you would consider some type of legislation to remove the restrictive and possibily unconstitutional nature of the Act. Following is the full text of the letter. I strongly hope that your point of view is similar to the author and my beliefs. My personal opinion is this type of action is next to impossible to enforce nor prudent in action. The following has been cut and pasted from: http://www.captainsquartersblog.com/mt/. Being a blogger myself as well as a believer the Constitution is not a "living document", I implore you to do what is right, not what is expedient.

This is what I used as a forward to Sen. Ron Wyden and Sen. Gordon Smith of Oregon regarding the Captains' response to the Bradley Scott kerfuffle. I just had to use "kerfuffle" once.

Cool

2005-03-03T18:18:00.000-08:00

I found this little tidbit over at the Volokh Conspiracy. Here

Mount Ranier

2005-03-03T17:26:00.000-08:00

Mount Rainier

One reason why I like living in this part of the country is its diversity and I don't mean that in a PC way. From Portland on just about anyday, in any direction, you can drive 1 to 2 hours and come across tremendous forests, meandering rivers and wide open beaches. I've got oodles more pics like the ones I have posted(scroll down to see more). It's hard not to shoot a decent picture around here. I'm currently using a Cannon G3. I just started fiddling with the manual settings but I like the presets on it. They seem to work well. Most of the shots are using the setting for photographing outdoors during the day. I have Photoshop I can't seem to find the time to really learn it(note to self:could be doing that instead of typing nonsense).

Constitutional Right not to be Offended

2005-03-03T11:54:00.000-08:00

The Harvard Crimson Online :: News

Where in the world do people get the idea the life is supposed to be comfortable and non offending? I'm offended daily by numerous things including my dog shitting in my livingroom. Now that IS offensive.

Students said that some of Pinkett Smiths remarks concerning appropriate gender roles were specific to heterosexual relationships.

So this is enough of a provocation to get these fools underoos in a bind?

BGLTSA Co-Chair Jordan B. Woods 06 said that, while many BGLTSA members thought Pinkett Smiths speech was motivational, some were insulted because they thought she narrowly defined the roles of men and women in relationships.

Some of the content was extremely heteronormative, and made BGLTSA members feel uncomfortable, he said.

Calling the comments heteronormative, according to Woods, means they implied that standard sexual relationships are only between males and females.

And what's wrong with "standard sexual relationships are only between males and females" seems to have worked for millennia.

In order to discuss these concerns and ensure that such a misunderstanding doesn’t occur again, Paulus said the BGLTSA and the Foundation are planning a joint breakfast later this week as well as a general discussion forum for all of the SAC member groups.

Paulus added that the Foundation will issue a letter later this week apologizing for any offense the show might have caused and encouraging concerned students to attend the planned discussions.

According to Paulus, the letter will acknowledge that “Pinkett Smith was just giving the story of her life. She just told things from her perspective, and her perspective was a heterosexual perspective. She wasn’t trying to be offensive. But some felt she was taking a narrow view, and some people felt left out.
”

This Paulus person is a weakkneed panty waste. Don't you just love the tolerance of these people, to have a different opinion than those of the anointed ones is considered offensive. I thought the whole idea of a education was to broaden ones perspective about life and the world, train the mind to think with clarity and to help prepare the students for life after they're done with their education?

h/t junkyardblog

Answer to my own question

2005-03-02T12:31:00.000-08:00

I asked in my previous post

They can't see past their myopic view and even hint at givng GWB any credit for what is going on. "but it's not necessarily directly related to the fact that we went into Iraq militarily." then what did cause it? France, Germany and Russia sure didn't help any. Maybe it's some mysterious force of the universe that caused all those people to empty into the streets of Beirut and demand the Syrians out of their country?

Well I came up with the answer, its FREEDOM, the natural yearning of all human beings.

Democrats hate America

2005-03-02T12:05:00.000-08:00

OpinionJournal - Best of the Web Today

This is going to be a on going feature here at thekaostheory, pointing out how the Dem's are 100% unamerican.

This takes the cake. I'm beginning to decisively conclude that the Dem's don't give a rats ass about this country. They relish in anything bad that happens to the US. Whether it be militarily, economically or socially. Here's a couple of excerpts from the Jon Stewart show via the James Taranto's's Best of the Web.

Soderberg: Well, I think, you know, as a Democrat, you don't want anything nice to happen to the Republicans, and you don't want them to have progress. But as an American, you hope good things would happen. I think the way to look at it is, they can't credit for every good thing that happens, but they need to be able to manage it. I think what's happening in Lebanon is great, but it's not necessarily directly related to the fact that we went into Iraq militarily.

Get it, "as a Democrat you don't want anything nice to happen to the Republicans, and you don't want them to have progress". But what if that it is good for the country as a whole? These people are deranged and truly do not care for or even like this country. They can't see past their myopic view and even hint at givng GWB any credit for what is going on. "but it's not necessarily directly related to the fact that we went into Iraq militarily." then what did cause it? France, Germany and Russia sure didn't help any. Maybe it's some mysterious force of the universe that caused all those people to empty into the streets of Beirut and demand the Syrians out of their country?

More:

Stewart: This could be unbelievable!

Soderberg:---series of Nobel Peace Prizes here, which--it may well work. I think that, um, it's--

Stewart: [buries head in hands] Oh my God! [audience laughter] He's got, you know, here's--

Soderberg: It's scary for Democrats, I have to say.

Stewart: He's gonna be a great--pretty soon, Republicans are gonna be like, "Reagan was nothing compared to this guy." Like, my kid's gonna go to a high school named after him, I just know it.

Soderberg: Well, there's still Iran and North Korea, don't forget. There's hope for the rest of us.

Once again they just don't get it, if we went into North Korea and rid the country of it's evil dictator, they would say what about country xyz? When xyz was taken care of the would go down to the next problem on the list. What about...fill in the blank....These people were in power for 8 long years and they couldn't do .001% of what has been accomplished in 4 years.

One nice thing to come out of this exchange was when Jon Stewert said the following.

Stewart: [crossing fingers] Iran and North Korea, that's true, that is true [audience laughter]. No, it's--it is--I absolutely agree with you, this is--this is the most difficult thing for me to--because, I think, I don't care for the tactics, I don't care for this, the weird arrogance, the setting up. But I gotta say, I haven't seen results like this ever in that region.

There might be some hope but I'm not going to hold my breath.

Update: Here's the link to the video feed.

USC Football Schedule

2005-03-01T20:24:00.000-08:00

Interesting schedule from my perspective, I might be able to attend 2 games up here in the Northwest this year. Eugene is great in September, the weatther can be absolutely beautiful. Blue skies, Williamette river flowing by and plently of pissed off Duck fans. Just like in that commercial, Pricless! Seattle at anytime of the year can be interesting. The way the weather has been around here lately, no rain to speak of in January or February, it will probably be snowing in October when the Trojans invade treehugger land. As my English friend has remarked to me in the past. "No worries, mate. Now sod off, swampy!

Quote of the Week

2005-03-01T19:52:00.000-08:00

I decide to add a quote of the week underneath my banner. This will change weekly and hopefully stirs the imagination in those millions of readers who peruse this blog daily. So I uped my bandwith allowance and threw caution to the wind. I'm trully daring soul to risk all that. This weeks entry was from the great Ronaldus Maximus, enjoy.

This is real funny

2005-02-25T13:17:00.000-08:00

The Brits are at it again.

The sketch opens with Zippy peeling a banana...

Zippy: "One skin, two skin, three skin, four.... "
George: "Zippy, where is Bungle?"
Zippy: "I think Geoffrey is trying to get him up"

We see a view of the door and hear Bungle moaning from behind it.

Bungle: "Geoffrey, I can't get it in"
Geoffrey: "You managed it last night"
Bungle: "I know, let's try it round the other way around. Ooooooh, I've got it in"

Bungle and Geoffrey enter the studio with Bungle carrying a hammer and peg kit

Bungle: "Would you stick this on the shelf, George"
George: "I can't reach, you'll have to stick it up yourself,

Geoffrey (to camera) " Hello everyone, today we are talking about playing"

Bungle: "Playing with each other, Geoffrey?"
Geoffrey: "Yes Bungle, do you have a special friend that you like to play with?"
George: "Yesterday we played with our balls.

Are we going to play with our friend's balls today?"

Bungle: "Yes, and we can play with our twangers as well."
Geoffrey (to camera): Have you seen Bungles twanger?
Zippy: "Oh I have, I showed him how to pluck with it."
Bungle: "It's my plucking instrument."

Geoffrey asks the audience if they can pluck like Bungle

Zippy: "I can, I'm the best plucker here."
George: "And I'm good at banging. My peg's hard isn't it Zippy?"
Zippy: "Well of course it is, Your peg wouldn't go in if it was soft."
Geoffrey: "Let's get back to Bungle's twanger."
Bungle (excited): "Oooooh Geoffrey, we could all paint our twangers couldn't we?"

Go watch it yourself, make sure you aren't eating or drinking anything.

....

h/t spitbull

Weekly Darwin Award Winner

2005-02-25T12:03:00.000-08:00

Darwin Awards

13 July 1997, Virginia) Eric A. Barcia, a 22-year-old Reston, VA resident, was found dead yesterday after he used bungee cords to jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle, police said.

The fast food worker taped a number of bungee cords together and strapped one end around his foot. Barcia had the foresight to anchor the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, and he even remembered to measure the length of the bungee cords to make sure that they were a few feet short of the 70 foot drop. He proceeded to fall headfirst from the trestle, and hit the pavement 70 feet below several seconds later.

Fairfax County police said "The stretched length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground." Perhaps the deceased fast food worker should have stuck to the line, "Do you want fries with that?"

Jerry Springer's World

2005-02-23T11:05:00.000-08:00

Salt Lake Tribune - Nation/World

I swear this could have been a real episode of Jerry Springer. It has all the buzzwords, a guy named "Billy Bob" or having 2 first names, drinking, thefts, Ku Klux Klan, girlfriend craving sex from anybody, gunplay and of course a guy named "Wild Bill".

People different from us: A jury in Nacogdoches, Texas, convicted Jerry Don Hartless in January of killing his former best friend, Billy Bob Wallace, during a group drinking bout one night along the Angelina River. According to testimony, Hartless believed that Wallace had stolen his boat motor but couldn't prove it. Then, that night, the group discussed a recent Jerry Springer show featuring a black man claiming to be a member of the Ku Klux Klan, and the alcohol-fueled Hartless insinuated that Wallace's girlfriend, who was there, craved sex with black men. (All the drinking group were white.) When
Wallace objected, Hartless shot him. A witness to the shooting was Wallace's adult son, Wild Bill Wallace (which is his actual birth name).

Icewater

2005-02-21T17:15:00.000-08:00

La Connor WA

2005-02-21T15:48:00.000-08:00

Beryl Wood, Columbia Gorge

2005-02-21T15:46:00.000-08:00

Update: Now I know what this reminds me of, it's the face in "The Scream" by Edvard Munch Or maybe not, you decide.

The Scream

Balloon Dog

2005-02-20T17:06:00.000-08:00

Has anybody else see this from Sci-Fi channel? Here I go again another mental image forming. In a an agency you have the Sci Fi channel guys and gals on one side and the agency creative staff on the other. Here's what I think must of transpired.

Sci Fi: "We need a good segway from our commercials to our main content. Have you some ideas?"

Ad guys:grumbling noises

Sci Fi:"Well?"

Ad guys:still more grumbling noises.

Sci Fi:"And"

Ad guys:"Let's see, I've got an idea. Why don't we put a guy on stage pretending to be a one of those kiddy balloon freaks you see at Chuckee Cheese. Then you add the dog, you know dogs are always good advertising. Kids love'em. Wait, wait I think I've got it now. We'll have the balloon freak blow into the dogs ass til the dog's head explodes into a cartoon dog head. It gets better, he does this Multiple times until the whole dog is just one huge pissed off cartoon dog who's just had some weirdo blowing air up his ass."

Sci fi:

Ad guys:

Sci Fi:Brilliant!!!

genital bracelet

2005-02-19T14:03:00.000-08:00

NYC's Clothing-optional restaurant - Feb. 18, 2005

Somebody has to check into his relationship with his pupils while he was a "retired junior high school English teacher". Nobody just picks up the idea of a "genital bracelet" at sixty-five. I can just hear it. Honey got to run down to the porn shop and get me a new genital bracelet. I hear they're bring out 3 new colors this year.

h/t http://www.barking-moonbat.com/

2005-02-18T21:13:00.000-08:00

Cannon Beach

This is mid-February folks, it's supposed to be friggin cold and raining.

Weekly Darwin Award Winner

2005-02-18T16:50:00.000-08:00

Death by Lava Lamp

28 November 2004, Washington | We have a new Darwin winner, with the recent demise of a man at the hands of his lava lamp. "Why on Earth he heated a lava lamp on the stove, we don't know," said baffled police.

No drug or alcohol evidence was found; Philip Quinn, 24, in his right mind, placed a lava lamp on his kitchen burner and turned up the flame. In due course, he rediscovered this favorite explosive generator of deadly shrapnel. He was found dead in his Kent trailer home, a shard of glass through his heart.

This will be a weekly post dedicated to all those good people who do their very best to cleanse the gene pool of planet Earth.

2005-02-18T16:46:00.000-08:00

Possum Boy

Spotted this guy at Pike's Place Market in Seattle.

2005-02-18T16:38:00.000-08:00

Le Tour Eiffel

This is a pic I took on our summer vacation in 2003. Taken during the heat wave in Europe where all the Surrender Monkeys were dropping like flies.

2005-02-18T16:34:00.000-08:00

Bath England

In honor of the previous post, a gratuitous pic of England.

Tsunami

2004-12-27T18:50:00.000-08:00

FOXNews.com
How long before the Bush admin is blamed for this.

Scott Peterson, Ol' Sparky, Ol' Sparky, Scott Peterson

2004-12-13T15:15:00.000-08:00

MSNBC - Jury says Scott Peterson should die

Looks like they need to get ol' Sparky tuned up

First, hopefully of many.

2004-12-12T18:19:00.000-08:00

And in the beginning there was KAOS.